rome protest

A line or two about being part of 'the survivor's voice' protest in Rome. I always felt that Rome was the beginning of all child abuse. It was Rome who allowed it to continue, who facilitated huge numbers of sex offender clergy moving from place to place thus creating a massive victim population. Rome devastated rather than saved vulnerable children . Rome was not our pastor but our devil. Harsh words but true.

I needed to go to Rome, to the heart of the fire of hell, to the heart of power and disintegration of children's lives. To the corrupt centre of it all.

Now was an opportunity. In wheelchair I travelled and arrived. my lodgings were a small flat let out by an Italian couple two streets away from St Peters. ideal.

On the sat before the protest we gathered at the bottom of the spanish steps. A group of about 15-20 survivors representing Ireland, UK , Holand, Italy, America,Australia...friends, relatives were with us. We wore T-Shirts with 'Enough' emblazoned on them in different languages. Black text on white..symbolic.

TV crews from around the world gatehered too and I got an opportunity to say something which I belive was on the BBC & bsKyb.

I carried a T-Shirt for my twin sister , herself abused by a catholic priest who received not justice but threats from his order. The Marionists America.


The next day sunday we gathered in a room reminisicent of the upper room the apostles were in when Jesus appeared after his resurrection. It felt vey holy, very symbolic as we too waited for justice, spoke about pain, suffering and abusiveness from perpetrator AND church officials.

We were joined by a coach load of 42 deaf survivors from verona school for the deaf. They used sign language and had an interpreter. The interpreter translated their signed italian into spoken italian and another italian translated it into english. Commincation perfecto!

Stories of sexual abuse were shared, solidarity cemented, unity of purpose established. TV crews helped in conveying all worldwide. The presence of approx 150 survivors in Rome itself a new departure in survivors voices being heard.

later we went to our meeting place Castel Sant'Angelo. which sits on one end of a road where the other end stood St Peters.

As we arrived so did the plain clothed and armed uniformed paramilitary police. I was briefed on who were the plain clothed police. We gathered and heard speeches from Gary Bergeron and Bernie McDaide (see website www.survivorsvoice.org for full transcripts) . very powerful, very right.

By then we noticed that there had built a police cordon all around us. We were not allowed move off the piazza of the Castel. we were penned in, contained, emprisoned. We were persona non grata. We were not wanted. In other words the Italian police perceived us as dangerous agitators, intent on criminality, distubance, rabble raising hooligans, nonesence...we were the hurt, defiled, angry and abused children of Rome. Yet like many families were were resoundly rejected for saying so.

lombardi arrived from his vatican office...no warning, no planning...into the frey...he was mobbed...and found himself surrounded by angry deaf victims. He retreated hastily saying to the press "it was too difficult" dead right, too firey for him, too uncomfortable, too challanging, too honest. Agreed it was 'rough' for him but he was at no harm, could he not have stayed the course and heard and experienced that pain. he later saw some picked survivors privately. Again managed private secret meetings. When do we have anything in public.

Well at least he made the effort, but frankly what we wanted was to lay a cairn of stones on St peters ground. In memory of survivors/victims who walked this way and were harmed.

We lit candles and sang and held hands. But were penned in. Chaos reigned and word went round we would be let through one by one if we took off the T-shirts and put down the candles. so Brendan Butler and myself (in wheelchair) complied and got through, only for a female plain clothed police officer spot us and realising we were 'them' tried to stop us...I said to brendan...."keep going, keep going"...we got to the second cordon at St Peters and got through. I put my two stones, one for myself and one for my twin on a pilar and we turned to leave. At that point we were surrounded by both plain clothed and uniformed ITALIAN police who were working on Vatican territory. This shocked us. We were asked for our passports and these were taken away for nearly an hour. Meanwhile police hovered...we were not likely to flee...me in my wheelchair with no passports. I asked a woman police officer if she want to mass, she did, I asked why they were doing this, she said "its our job"...yeh, yeh...their job to harrass victims of clergy sexual abuse. To make us feel threatened, to contain us, to surround us..on the Holy Ground of St Peters...essentially OUR spiritual home...not THEIRS...ours.

After they let us go....without explanation..we were interviewed by reuters outside the parimeter fence.

An american survivor who was also 'detained' spoke of his utter anger at this treatment.

The day was over, I got into a taxi and there lost my camera.. a real blow and I was heartbroken.But I was also heartbroken and dismayed by my own Church being so 'bully-boyed' with armed police blocking my way from St peters. what does this say of the numerous apoligies the Pope has given in each country he visits. It says: 'hypocrisy'. It says 'PR' exercise, it says...'you don't get it!". it is meaningless in the face of total rejection of survivors in Rome. you rejected us. you said "go away"...you said "i don't want to know...to hear..not on your terms anyway...pharasees. Pharasees.

Yet we had prevailed...some survivors got through, defied the pope, Rome, Officialdom, police and harrassment. Left our mark, left our feelings, spoke of our degradation, defilement, injury and betrayal in ROME. at the heart of this infection, at the heart of this christian priestly 'sexocide' of children . By this I mean the killing of children's sexuality, beauty and body and soul by sex...distorted, violent, perverse and wholley devoid of care or protection/safety.Enabled by the vicar of Christ...huh!?

it was and still remains an act of brutal 'crime against humanity'. the humanity of thousands of children.

'sexocide', 'innocent-ocide''trust-ocide''love-ocide' 'soul-ocide' and so much more.

We prevailed and we will return..next year...in greater numbers join us then..

margaret